Has been attributed to Roger von Oech, Robert Benson, and two cruder versions to Andy Rooney and George Carlin.
Life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time, all your weekends, and what do you get at the end of it? DEATH. a great reward.
I think that the life cycle is backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way, then you live twenty years in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work.
You work forty years, until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You go to college, you do drugs, you do alcohol, you party, until you are ready for high school.
You become a little kid, you play, you go back to the womb, you spend the last nine months floating, and you finish off as a twinkle in someone's eye.